Sharon Craig (c)

We all have busy lives with deadlines and lots of demands. Yet why do some people remain calm and happy whilst others are bundles of stress? Here are 10 tips that can make all the difference!

1. Choose helpful thoughts

Our thoughts can be the most troublesome of all stressors in life. We create thoughts which often take us to past regrets and ‘failings’ and anxiety about the future hence negative emotions. Stress free living begins when you stop torturing yourself with what could, should or would have been and live in the present.

2. Set realistic goals

Ensure that your ‘to do list’ is realistic. When we set an unrealistic list of goals we create unnecessary stress and overwhelm in our lives. Reduce the number of ‘to do’ items in your life and you may just reduce the circuit overload.

3. Get enough sleep

Lack of sleep exacerbates the way we manage stress. Ensure you get enough sleep so that you are in a position to effectively deal with the stressors that come your way.

4. Schedule time to relax

With our busy lifestyles I frequently hear ‘I don’t have enough time’. Yet when we give ourselves time to relax, whether it is a run; yoga class or dinner with friends, we actually become more productive and effective. What can you schedule in this week?

5. Observe the real level of tension.

Sometimes we can put a lot of energy into something that doesn’t warrant the negative stress level we create for ourselves. When you feel yourself becoming stressed and tense, take a moment to step back from the situation and objectively look at the way you are reacting. Does the situation really validate your response?

6. Physical exercise

Exercise enhances overall health and wellbeing. Regular exercise boosts the immune system and helps prevent disease. It also improves mental health by managing stress and promoting positive self esteem.

7. Laugh

Laughter really is one of life’s best medicines. It strengthens your immune system, reduces stress and improves your intellectual performance. See the bright side of life and organise to see a funny film, spend time with friends or even try laughter therapy. You’ll wonder why you have wasted so many years being serious!

8. Know your boundaries

Learn to say no. In today’s busy world we are often constantly asked to be doing this and that. Assertive people are able to say no to those requests that will create more overload and stress.

9. Choose good company

Surround yourself with likeminded, positive and encouraging people who add to your health, enjoyment and happiness. Avoid those people that always focus on the negative and take your valuable energy away.

10. Breath

When we are stressed or anxious our breathing becomes shallow and fast. Awareness of your breathing is an excellent early-warning signal of tension. Concentrate on taking slow, deep breaths and hold for three seconds before breathing out again. By focusing on slowing the breath, you will begin to feel calmer before you know it!

Stress in inevitable! Learn your unique warning signs and practice preventative strategies so that you take charge of your life!

As we welcome a new decade, many people are dreaming and preparing for a year with a difference. The start of any year is often seen as an opportunity to set new goals or perhaps transfer last years goals onto the list for 2011.

We hope for changes in different areas of our life including relationships, work, health, spirituality and finances. The list of individual dreams and goals are as long and unique as the number of people living in the world today. For some it may be

finding their next meal whereas others are ready to take on the world.

Many of us focus on not achieving enough or have an often unrealistic list of goals. However, how often do you stop, just for a moment, to reflect on what you have achieved, what you have and what worked well?

I have always been someone with a lot of passion for life, believing that I could live until I was 1000 years old and never experience all the wonderful things the world has to offer. However, more often than not I achieve something only to quickly move onto the next exciting experience.

Although I have experienced so much, I realise that I often move onto the next item, not truly appreciating and reflecting on what I have actually done! I have to constantly remind myself that it is the journey not the destination that makes life special and rich

Today I wrote down my achievements, learnings and challenges during 2010. The process was an interesting insight into just how much I had achieved; the unique experiences, amazing connections with people and challenges that have given me additional resources that will prepare me, both personally and professionally, for the exciting year ahead.

Invest ten minutes in yourself and reflect on your 2010:

-          What have you learned this year?

-          Who has been an important part of your life (and let them know)

-          What has been fun and enjoyable?

-          What did you achieve?

-          What have been the wins professionally?

-          How have you developed personally?

-          What challenges have you overcome?

If you are like me, you will be pleasantly surprised by your discoveries. Life is always full of opportunities for learning and growth so set yourself a goal for 2011, achieve it then celebrate your success!

What is success for you? For me it is more than wealth, titles and status. Success is ensuring that I am living true to my values and living my purpose in an authentic way. Success requires planning. The analogy of a map is useful for us to define the following details: origin, destination, vehicle, backpack, landmarks, and route.

Origin:  Who you are

A map has a starting point, where you begin. You can probably relate to conversations where people introduce themselves as a Mother, Teacher, Entrepreneur or Student. These ‘labels’ do not describe WHO the person is. To truly understand yourself and live authentically, have a close look at your values, beliefs, dreams, principles and purpose. Other than the titles that society labels us with, who are you really? To truly know who you are requires reflection on your life experiences, skills, strengths, weaknesses, interests and abilities to give you greater clarity to who you TRULY are. With over 20 years of introspection and now understanding who I truly am, I live by my top values of authenticity; health; connection & love; integrity; service & contribution and variety & learning. When I live true to my values I am true to myself rather than trying to be what I believe society or others want me to be. When you know who you are, you cannot help but experience internal peace.

Destination: A vision of who you want to be

“Who do you want to be?” This is your vision. To create your true vision, it is essential to first understand who you really are, what you value and what you stand for. With love and clarity in your heart and soul; you give yourself permission to live authentically, in line with your true values, dreams and purpose. If you hardly know yourself, then your vision and goals for the future would be unclear. Your destination includes all aspects of your being: the physical, emotional, psychological, intellectual, and spiritual. Based on my own journey of discovering who I truly am, my beliefs, values, and principles are sound and I do not sway from who I truly am no matter who I meet or my life circumstances. If you are living someone else’s expectations then you are cheating yourself of true contentment.

Vehicle: Your Mission

A vehicle is the means by which you can reach your destination. Sometimes it can be understood as your vocation in life. Again, your mission will not be clear until you have been through the process of understanding your true self, who you are authentically. For myself, my mission has grown and changed over the years, however it has always involved vocations that inspire people to see their true worth and create the life they truly deserve. Therefore, I have volunteered in Australia and internationally and currently work as a Psychologist and Personal Coach so people recognise their true value and live authentically. It was only once I was able to understand my authentic self and clearly describe my vision and mission that I could live a life with purpose, dedicated to serving others

Travel Bag: Your knowledge, skills, and attitude

When you travel, what are the essential items that you don’t leave home without? These travel ‘necessities’ that make your journey more enjoyable are also required to live your vision. For instance, what knowledge, mind set, skills, life experiences, conversations and attitudes are required for you to live your dreams? Life is a journey where every experience provides the opportunity for more learning if we choose to do so. I truly believe that everyone has the potential to gain the mind set, skills and attitudes necessary to live the life they desire. However it is the responsibility of the individual to choose personal development as no-one else is able to do this for us. On the journey there are measures of success and times where it is evident that we need a few more supplies in our travel bag. What is it that you need to add? For myself, I love learning each and every day via coaching, reading, great conversations, seminars and wonderful clients for which I am privileged to not only assist them on their journey but strengthen the understanding of myself.

Landmarks and Route: S.M.A.R.T. objectives

  Landmarks confirm if you are on the right track while the route determines the travel time. Thus, in planning your life, landmarks and a route are necessary to achieve your goals. Landmarks are considered measures of your success or sometimes the indicator that something needs to be tweaked. Measures must be specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and time bound. I learnt the hard way by setting major landmarks at the same time and then wondered why I didn’t achieve what I set out to do! Therefore it is essential to set realistic goals that are challenging yet not impossible, as easy goals leave us bored whilst overly ambitious goals that are unobtainable in a given time frame can be disheartening.     

 Anticipate Turns, Detours, and challenges

The purpose of your life map is to minimise hasty and spur-of-the-moment decisions that can make you lose your way. There will always be challenges, detours and potholes in life. They are to be expected! The secret is developing the skills to overcome challenges and importantly the mindset to manage obstacles which are guaranteed when we are heading towards our goals. In life there are things that are beyond our influence as we can’t control other people or some events. Therefore see obstacles and challenges as an opportunity for personal and professional growth, knowing that overcoming the obstacle, gives you greater internal strength and ultimately success.

For you to ponder:

Who are you? What is your vision of who you want to be? What is your mission? What skills, knowledge, life experiences and attributes do you currently have and what do you need to learn? Do you have your clear goals written down? How are you prepared for the challenges that emerge when you are working towards your goals?