Sometimes, our doubts, fears and insecurities can become overwhelming and make us wish that we were someone else who has ‘got it all together’. Having worked with thousands of people, I continually hear people say that other people are better than us and have more potential. The reality is that other people have self doubts yet do not necessarily share them, leading us to falsely believe that we are the only ones with fears!      

Interestingly, a person that appear to have it all together or are perceived as being confident have self doubt and fears too. If you could mind read for a moment, you may be surprised that someone who is ‘successful’ in your mind may have thoughts including ‘I hope I am doing my job well enough’; ‘I wish I could have a body like John’s’ or ‘I wish I had better social skills’.

We may look at a young entrepreneur believing that he has everything: money, success, friends and a great business. Yet in the privacy of his own home he wonders why his last girlfriend left him; wishes his nose was different shape or whether he is good enough to make the business succeed

Interesting isn’t it? We envy other people for appearing to have it all and admiring their wonderful lives. Meanwhile, they may look at us and wish they could trade places with us. When we don’t know or accept ourselves for who we truly are, we can tend to feel insecure in comparison to other people. We can suffer from low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence and lose hope in living our potential as we may not be good enough.

One key to self improvement is to learn more about ourselves by listening and talking to a trusted friend, coach or counsellor. When you can express yourself openly and honestly, you are able to get a better insight into yourself by asking questions like “Do you think I talk too much?”, “Do I seem arrogant?”, “What could I do to be more friendly when meeting new people?”. The process of self discovery creates greater self awareness and self improvement. Be curious and open your mind to learning more about who you truly are. After all isn’t it better to find out the truth sooner rather than later.

Be the role model that demonstrates self improvement makes us better people who can inspire other people so others want to follow our example. To create stable and loving relationships you must love yourself first. Remember, you cannot give what you do not have therefore self love is essential for all relationships to be fulfilling.

Accepting your true self is the first step to self improvement. Ditch those unhelpful thoughts that sabotage you and prevent you from getting the results you want in life. We all have unique qualities that can serve ourselves and others. However until we accept and better understand ourselves, our treasures will not be discovered.

Nobody is perfect. We sometimes wish we had better skills, personalities or bodies. Yet by focusing on what we don’t like we are forgetting all the good qualities and strengths that we possess. Self improvement and loving yourself is not a matter of shouting to the whole world that you are perfect and you are the best. It’s the virtue of acceptance and contentment. When we begin to improve ourselves, we then begin to feel contented and happy with our unique selves and inspire others just by being the REAL YOU.